So. Seriously. I am happier about Elliott being in the top 3 than Chris being sent home. Last night was a good show for results night, and the last 3 minutes made some of the best television (barring Sopranos) of the year.
It started off innocuously enough: Recap, Ford commercial, and then some tape of the kids at Graceland. The cameraman tried to not move in too close on Priscilla, but even with Cybil Shepherd filter-lens, there was no escaping the weirdness of her face. I don't know if she has the same bad surgeon as Kenny Rogers, or if she possibly has the same embalmer as her late husband, but it was bad, man. Once that was over, the kids did the group sing, which was a medley of Elvis songs. Elliott, of course, sounded the best as he kicked it off with "Don't Be Cruel," and even when he jumped his cue later in the song it was just adorable.
At one point in the program, we got treated to seeing Paula sit on Simon's lap - an interesting choice that brought about lap dance connotations, especially after Ryan setting it up last night with his stripper comment. We got to see Rebecca Romijn be used like a pawn when she requested Taylor do an encore of "Jailhouse Rock" for her. Taylor, he jumped up and obliged, and though it wasn't quite as good as it was on performance night, partly because he again showed his affinity for ill-fitting shirts, it was entertaining enough. At first I thought they were just giving Taylor some pimpage that he hadn't had in a while, but once the results came tumbling down I realized they were playing at something a bit more manipulative. I don't care.
Last night proved just how good the payoff for manipulation is when Mr. Daughtry got sent packing.
I have to say, I truly believe he was shocked, because I don't think he's that good of an actor. You see the photos down there, and they say it all on their own, but I can't resist mentioning a couple of things.
It started with Ryan dividing them into pairs: the top two and the bottom two. This is when Chris started his deep inhaling exercises, which would continue for the next couple of minutes. I don't think he ever expected to go home, but it was a chop to his ego to even consider being in the bottom two. It was interesting, those few seconds, because I think everyone has the gist now that if you're standing next to Taylor, you're safe. However, the twist was that it's also become pretty obvious that if you're standing next to Elliott, you're really not safe. Plus, with Katharine's suck out last night, I think Chris realized he was possibly bottom two. However, at that point, I think he was mainly annoyed at being in the bottom two, but nowhere did his fame-whoring ego guess that he'd be going home.
Also, Katharine's laser-eyed, bitch face was solidly in place for the entire process. I know it's not easy enduring this shit, but you'd think that after 9 weeks she'd get some sort of handle on her facial expressions, especially considering that she hopes to pursue a career in acting. But she hasn't. Her inner-bitch rages at the slightest provocation.
Taylor, he's usually rather reserved when he's announced safe. But he celebrated last night, and I think it was because he was next to Elliott. I mean, Elliott's kind of the black widow of results night. He's in the bottom most of the time, but he's never the one leaving. And, Taylor lacks the "invincible me" ego that would've let him feel more comfortable.
After some more deep breathing from Chris, Ryan toys with Chris and Katharine only in a minimal way. Probably for two reasons: Taylor's encore ate up plenty of the spotlight time, and also because, I think once in a great while, Ryan enjoys telling someone that they're leaving. I believe this was one such instance. He didn't pad it or soften it. If anything, he stuck the knife in fairly abruptly.
That brings us to The Look. At this exact moment is when Chris's yolk-brain gets completely scrambled.
Katharine is shocked, yes. But Chris is completely blindsided. And he looks PISSED. He is FRYING over it. Frying just like the egghead he is.
Paula, of course, does her despondent head hang. Simon, he contemplates, but he's fairly inscrutable as always.
After that, we get a little more deep breathing on Chris's part, and then as his "Bad Day" montage rolls, he continues to simmer in his own raging ego.
Remember how I said it's been disappointing that lately everyone's handled it so well and with so much class and grace? Chris didn't handle it well. Chris didn't lose his shit completely, but he didn't do anything to make me say, "Oh, I feel bad now." He just glared and glared at the screen, half hypnotized by his own self-love, and half still pissed off.
Last but not least, even though his sing out got cut off, but we did get one last encore from his wallet chain!
Next week, we get THREE songs from everyone. This is great news for Taylor and Elliott, and bad news for Katharine. If history repeats, the contestants pick one song, the judges pick one song for them, and then Clive picks a song for them.
It'll be interesting to see how the press shakes out this week, because it's very apparent that Elliott was the whipping-boy, manipulated image last week with their discounting him everywhere to build his "underdog" image. It may not have been "nice" on AI's part, but it did make his victory that much sweeter. Also, though he handles himself with class, it was apparent that he'd noticed it had gone on when during the performance show Simon remarked, "you're the underdog" and Elliott did his famous eyebrow cock in response. His look was brief, but it clearly said, "No shit fucker, and you're the one who put me in that position."
But he's weathered the trips to the bottom very well, and he seems to stay focused on his performances no matter what they throw at him. This week, they all get to go visit home. That means that Katharine goes up the block. I'm interested to see Taylor's reception. But I'm thinking Richmond is going to pull all the stops for Elliott and treat him like royalty. Fucking good! They jumped on the bandwagon a bit late for him, but the past few weeks they've really gone apeshit as he's progressed. They'll throw a parade. Elliott will cry. It'll be very endearing. You know, it'll make for good TV.