I'm proud of you, Idol voters. Elliott was safe, and Ace is gone. So. To wrap up this week, Rod was cool. Extremely cool. He's also a poster boy for good, subtle plastic surgery.
Ace is gone. I was starting to wonder if he'd be the cockroach of the season, surviving against all odds. But I did expect him to go tonight. I was wrong about one thing though. He handled it exceptionally well. I'll miss his foxy brother.
Chris hit the bottom three, but it all went so quickly there wasn't really time to draw it out and milk it for shock value. Never fear, he'll be fine. In related news, Simon's beyond being a fucking asshole now. He took credit for Chris's performance last night, so when Ryan asked him tonight if he'll take credit for the bottom three, Simon got defensive and said, "I didn't sing the song." Simon used to be kind of spot on. Even when he was manipulating and steering the votes, there was usually truth behind his words. But now? He's just become a mocking, tap-dancing, cranky company man pushing an agenda, without any credibility left.
Maybe Simon's bitter. Because I'm now also throughly convinced we all had it called wrong and that if votes truly do decide this thing, there's no stopping Taylor. I don't think there's any way for Chris to overcome the massive Taylor fanbase at this point. Yeah, I'd prefer to believe Elliott still has a chance, but, whatever. As long as Pickler goes before Elliott, I'll be satisfied. And the thought of Taylor winning and sticking it up Simon's ass like that makes me giggle. I still think the immediate pecking order is Paris and Elliott in the judges minds, but, if the Elliott troops stay dedicated and vote next week like they did this week, there's no reason he won't be sticking around for quite some time, cause he's sure as hell not going to screw up the singing. Can you see it? One more week and then he'll be singing to us TWICE every show. Yes, that needs to happen.
Next week is love songs with guest Andrea Bocelli.
Honestly, I feel like they're making this shit up just for me the past couple weeks. Andrea Bocelli. Madone! I'm a guinea girl to the core and I've still got "Romanza" in strong rotation on my play list. I don't care if it's tacky, dorky, and cliche. I love him and I love that CD. His newest is "Amore" (a collection of standards, and it even has Chris Botti as a guest artist) and I've pretty much worn that out, too. I don't expect any of the wannabe idols to try and sing one of his songs, and I really don't want to even think about Elliott trying to sing "Con Te Partiro" because if he could somehow handle it, it might actually kill me. I don't know what the "love songs" parameters will entail quite yet. Maybe it'll be stuff pulled from the "Amore" album, done in the English translations. (I bet any money Chris would fight for "Can't Help Falling In Love") Or perhaps this is a chance for Elliott to finally bust out some Donny Hathaway for us. That'd be sexier than this:
I know, right? Looking at that picture (compliments of Rickey.org) makes me feel dirty and pervy, too. I like it.
Anyhow, next week, it's also another opportunity for Chris to glare at us angrily while his wallet chain sways and he serenades us.
Again, thank you for this Nigel.