I'm talking about this too late to help anyone, mostly because I was ashamed of my own viewing habits. But I watched this season of The Celebrity Apprentice, and I have to tell you, it kicked ass. There were some outrageous fights, and it produced the single greatest contestant ever: Piers Morgan. He was both the most entertaining and overall best candidate this show has ever seen.
They set up the finale to be a jingoistic battle between "good guy" American Trace Adkins and the evil Brit, Piers. Problem was, throughout the season, Piers was aggressive and definitely obnoxious, but also so clearly superior in fundraising and wit and smarts. Also, though he's quiet, Trace was often also really condescending in his attitude about anyone who's different from him.
There was all kinds of great shit this season, such as Christian hypocrite S. Baldwin, too-invested in his Sopranos role rat-boy Vinnie Pastore, and the return of uber-bitch idiot Omarosa.
It looked to be like a close finale, with all signs pointing to Trace, until he got up and sang his new single. At that point, I checked DialIdol and saw he was actually in the bottom three and likely to be sent home.
The best was when Trace thought he had it in the bag, because everyone talked about how nice he was. (you know, in a homophobic, surly sort of way.) But, sadly for Trace, his charity was something about people who are afraid of peanut butter, which he ended up raising about $12k for, mostly because Ivanka threw him a bone and bid on a dinner with him. Meanwhile, Brit Piers out-Americaned him by choosing the Intrepid Fallen Heroes as his charity, and he raised about a half million dollars for them.
But hands down, Piers's best move? They held an auction, and he got his pal Simon Cowell to call in and bid. A guy in the auction audience raised the bid to $50k, so Piers, via phone, told Simon that. So Simon raised his bid to $75k. At that point, the guy in the audience, who Simon couldn't see, dropped out. But Piers told Simon he'd countered with $85k, therefore forcing Simon to raise his bid to $100k. Bloody well done, Mate.
In Idol news, here's Chikezie's exit interview.