Thursday, March 29, 2007

Sligh(t) out of hand and a great, just great contest

So Chris Sligh is gone, because some amorphous, indeterminate entities continue to vote for Haley. Fine by me! It was a bit of a bitchslap, because they guy thought he knew the Idol game. And he did know the game, but he was too heavy-handed with it. Though, let's give him his due -- he made it to the top 10 on the basis of a non-threatening voice even though he looked like Porky Pig in hipster glasses and a well-worn Annie wig. Ultimately, though, he tried to play both sides, and that just won't work. You most certainly can be sarcastic and mocking of the proceedings and get away with it, even on AI. But you can't simultaneously ask for love and acceptance by the masses.

His behavior was kind of like if Sid Vicious had puked on people in the audience and then apologized and asked forgiveness for it. No. Sid didn't do that. He'd just vomit and leave it at that. Chris would give a little snark and then prostrate himself before the judges and audience after the fact. It all just made him smarmy.

Naturally, I'm all excited for Tony Bennett next week. We'll see if anyone has the guts to belt out "Rags to Riches" with Carmine Ragusa gusto. Sanjaya's already murdered "Steppin' Out" so maybe he'll take his shot at effeminating the hell out of "For Once In My Life."

Anyhow, because I love Tony so much, I'll run a little contest. Ready for it? Here goes: How many times will Tony say great? Readers here can take a guess at the number. (kind of like "guess the number of jellybeans in the jar" thing.) I'll then keep a careful tally, and whoever comes the closest will win a free, signed copy of any of my books or anthologies. (24/7, Trattoria, Mutual Holdings, Rebellion: New Voices of Fiction, Caramel Flava, Mammoth Best New Erotica 6, or Best American Erotica 2007.) Your pick which one you want. And if anyone nails the exact number, I'll even toss in a little Benedetto bonus.

So drop a comment with your guess here, or e-mail it to me. It'll be great, just great. Really, really great.

And, in the meantime, don't forget to stop by Rebel Press to check out the latest chapters of Don Capone's free, serialized novel Like I've Never Been Born.


Mega Munch said...

I am not excited about Tony Bennett, but I'll wager 14 greats. That's about 1.5 per contestant.

Jordan E. Rosenfeld said...

I'm shooting for 17 greats. (was going to say 27, but I'll stick with 17).


Anonymous said...

Porkie pig in an Annie wig ... LMFAO!!

Dave Clapper said...

Dammit, Jordan, I was gonna take 17. Okay, I'll go with 23.

cam said...

I'll say 15 "great"s. The shipping fee to my country would be a killer though. :P

Anonymous said...

How about 18?

Susan, you're slipping!! Your 'cupcake' Elliott has been tearing up the Indie sales record with his new album.

"With his debut album, AI5 second runner up Elliott Yamin breaks the soundscan record for the highest selling debut ever on an independent label. His record sold over 90,000 copies in it's first week. "

I expected you to do a review.

NormalGuyNormalGirl said...

Good to have you back. I missed your reviews something terrible while your book was painting Vegas red.

I thought Sligh butchered The Police, so he was my guess to go. I still can't wrap my head around what demographic supports Haley, though. The one that most annoys me of them all, fwiw, is No Neck Richardson.

My money is on 26.

Anonymous said...

Hi Susan,

A little
Alec Baldwin/Tony The
Tiger Voice whispered
a winner in my ear:





Final answer.

That's just

Dontcha think?



puppypundit said...

Wait is the 'great' count just for the singing night or the boot night too?

I bet 22 'greats' for one night but I'll up it to 36 for both.

Don Capone said...


Alice said...

Been missing you, Susan. Welcome back from your trip. Good wrap up on the Sligh fiasco.
How did your brackets fare? If the Gators win tonight, I might salvage a bit of self-respect - nut not much.

Tony Bennett night will be great - if only last year's contestants would be singing. ;-) I'll go big with 29 greats - the same as John Smoltz' uniform.