Monday, March 26, 2007

Vegas Book Tour -- week two

My book is still in Vegas. People say that 2 weeks is too long to spend in Vegas, but if you know my book, you know that it adapts to the rhythms of the city and manages to not just survive, but flourish.

This is my book indulging its rapidly escalating alcohol dependency during the day. It enjoyed the company of a charming bartender.

This is my book testing its luck at the slots while in the throes of the aforementioned afternoon bender. (the book's owner may or may not have also been indulging, hence the blurriness of the photo.)

This is my book after having lost all its accumulated royalties in the slots. For ten days now it has been surrounded by books with fewer pages, which makes them thinner. It has seen books that have much more appealing covers; some even with fancy dust jackets. The other books earn bigger royalties. The other books have less content inside, but boast impeccable punctuation. My book drowns its sorrows.

But Lady Luck can change in an instant in Vegas! The aforementioned charming bartender, who is surrounded by the thinner, more attractively covered, and wealthier books every day, still seemed interested in my book. My book, as is its nature, reciprocated his advances. 'Tis true -- the lady is a tramp!

The next morning, my book paid the price for confronting its crisis of esteem with liquor and sex.

A small price to pay, really. At least it hasn't been dogeared or left behind in a taxi.


Don Capone said...

I hope safe sex was practiced. Or shall we expect a sequel?

NormalGuyNormalGirl said...

This is just too funny...

A few years back, a friend of mine had a popular website called "" where he photographed a plush doll of South Park's lovable handicapped character in all kinds of compromising positions. Timmy also visited Vegas (including an unmentionable excursion to the Spearmint Rhino). Timmy and your book would have gotten along quite well.

I do miss hearing what you'd have to say about Sanjaya... :)

cam said...

Haha, this is brilliant. :) I haven't seen your book here, boo.

SusanD said...

cam, I'll do my best to get it touring everywhere before I die. It will be dogearred and ragged, but they'll be happy travel scars.

Jason -- I love the Timmy thing. Sadly, I don't have much to say about Sanjaya. People who comment here are funnier about him than I am.

Don -- I tried so hard to think of the "safe sex" accessory for books. bookmark? not quite. Book jacket? too much. I couldn't come up with anything, so I let them have at it. I was considering a "sequel" baby, but thought it'd be just too precious.